So, I had some thoughts last night when I was half asleep, and I think I want to flesh them out a bit.
The basis of my thoughts? Exclusionists don’t want aspecs of any form in LGBTQ+ or queer spaces at all.
We’ve been seeing, for a long time, posts from exclusionists who make posts that say things like “aces aren’t LGBT,” “aces are homophobes,” “aces are this,” “aces are that.” And inclusionists have time and time again pointed out that this shows that ace discourse isn’t only about the ‘cishet’ aspecs. Exclusionists will usually waffle about how they meant ‘cishet’ aces, but considering how often this keeps happening, I’m pretty sure it’s no longer a mistake. Especially when you factor in the frequent comparing aspecs to horrible groups and people (incels [x] [x] [x] [x] [x], white supremacists and Nazis [x], cults [x], Trump [x] [x] [x] [x], Pence [x] [x], Regan [x], Ayn Rand [x], Alex Jones [x], etc.) that exclusionists often try to pass off as ‘jokes,’ and how much other crap they spew towards aspecs including things like rape [x] and death [x] [x] [x] [x] wishes and threats [x] [x] [x] [x], and… just, I’m going to link this whole thing rather than continuing to pull links. [x]
But, as if that wasn’t enough, there’s more that really makes me think that exclusionists want aspecs – not just the ‘cishet’ ones, but all of them – to be eradicated from LGBTQ+ and queer spaces.
And what is that exactly?
The pushing of getting rid of the split attraction model.
What, exactly, would happen to people who genuinely have split attraction if we weren’t allowed to say that we’re both aspec and another orientation?
Well… we’d have to choose. Are we LGBT or are we aspec?
And there you have it. The reason why exclusionists continue to use “aces” to mean “’cishet’ aces” is because they think that only the ‘cishet’ aces (and aros, when they remember aros) would choose to continue using their aspec label if they were to choose between that and whatever other orientation they have.
They think that someone like me, an arospec bisexual, if forced to choose, would say I’m bisexual, and drop the arospec label. Then, yes, they could exclude all arospecs, because only the ‘cishet’ arospecs would be left identifying with the aro label.
They think the same of acespec people with another LGBTQ+ or queer orientation. They think that making an acespec person choose between their other LGBTQ+ orientation and their acespec one would leave only the ‘cishet’ acespecs left identifyin with the ace label.
And then they would be excluding all aces and aros.
The ‘problem’ they’re having, from their point of view, is that they haven’t established that yet. And so their use of “aces” and “aros” to mean “only the ‘cishet’ ones” doesn’t work the way they intend it to.
But, of course, the real problem is thinking that those of us with split attraction are ever going to stop using the SAM for exclusionists’ ease of making a coherent argument. Or that if we were forced to choose wouldn’t pick our aspec orientations over our other orientation because, god forbid, we feel more connection to our aspec label (which DOES NOT mean we are any less our other orientation, and those who feel more connection to their other orientation any less aspec).
Exclusionists are aphobes. They think our aspec orientations are lesser, not only to us, but in general. They don’t want aspecs at all, regardless of other LGBTQ+ or queer identities.
Remember when aphobes created a whole scene here about ace people celebrating ace awareness week when only a few days ago trans people’s human rights were being endangered by the trump administration but stopped pretending to care about trans people and stopped mentioning the endangerment trans people sre STILL facing as soon as ace awareness wekk ended lmfao
someone: one of my partners raped me because they said they could fix my asexuality
some of yall: and then the whole bus clapped! tag urself I’m the partner lol
some of yall: Sweaty 🙂 it just didn’t happen like you said it did 🙂 you can’t be trusted with your own experiences 🙂
some of yall: the term “corrective rape” is a lesbian term! I know u never used that term in ur tags or OP but fuck you for using it!
some of yall: what’s next? people claiming that they were abused and raped because they like green? lmao these cringy asexies don’t know when to quit :’)
over 2 years ago, right when tumblr was at its most biphobic, I made a separate blog. A secret bi discourse blog, basically, where I could reblog things and fight biphobes without worrying about people i know irl finding out things about me that i’m not ready to come out to them about
Not long after making this blog, I kind of drifted off and did other things. This blog has been primarily abandoned for a long time. I’ve occasionally popped back on to post some things, but mostly it’s been left to gather dust.
And then I realized something. Every single person that I followed on this blog, which began its life as a blog to fight biphobia on tumblr, was a bi person or someone who also was vocally against biphobia. I blocked a lot of people for being really awful biphobes… and then I kind of left. This blog and its following list and block list are a time capsule from the heyday of biphobic discourse on tumblr
So I came back on again, and I went through a bunch of blogs, and here’s what I’ve found:
I have scrolled through my dash, I have checked the blogs that I followed for being vocally protective of bi people on tumblr. And what did I find? FOUR exclusionists. All of the rest are either inactive, have not posted enough to determine a position, or (overwhelmingly) inclusionists. In fact, my dash on this blog is almost ENTIRELY inclusionist posts. On a blog I created to follow people defending bi people.
So I’m checking the block list. All of these people I blocked for being biphobes.
I went on their blogs and to /search/ace
Exclusionist. Biphobe. Blog is wiped clean. Exclusionist. Biphobe. Exclusionist. Biphobe. Truscum.* Exclusionist. Biphobe. Exclusionist. Biphobe Terf. Outlier, mega racist anti-sjw Exclusionist. Biphobe. Biphobe. No ace discourse on blog. Exclusionist. Truscum.* Exclusionist. Biphobe. Truscum.* Exclusionist. Biphobe. Terf.* Exclusionist. Biphobe. Exclusionist. Biphobe. Biphobe. No ace discourse on blog. Blog has been wiped
* – I wasn’t looking specifically for truscum or transphobes but in these instances it was readily apparent just by clicking on the blog! Fun.
Is this a scientific experiment? Nah. Are the sample sizes large enough to say anything definitively? No. But it is really telling that a dash that, 2 years ago, was full of bi positivity and defending against biphobic tumblr discourse, is now entirely the same thing but for aces.
So the next time an inclusionist tells you that this is ALL rehashed 2014 bihet discourse, maybe listen to us.
REG’s are all literally the same. TERFs, acephobes, biphobes…the same.
Like, guys. That’s literally what that’s for. The entire point behind “anti-MOGAI” as an idea is to hate on non-binary and a-spec people and the way they choose to define themselves.
“Anti-MOGAI“ is, fundamentally, aphobic and NBphobic. Sorry you got suckered into it, but that’s how it is.
A reminder that this blog supports Asexual Awareness Week, and also trans rights under the Trump administration. Both are important, and aces don’t deserve to have our pride diminished for the (phony) sake of us trans people.
Y’all really gonna make the fact that transgendered people might lose their human rights about asexuals?
hey op this whole post is trash and u should delete yourself
First of all, it’s transgender people, not ‘transgendered’. I say so, because I’m trans.
Second, it doesn’t take a genius to recognize a pride event simultaneously with a current political crisis, even if one is largely unrelated to another. But it does take some goddamn cruelty to crush one’s right to pride for the fake ‘sake’ of another. A trending hashtag doesn’t exactly clog up bandwidths, you assholes.
Third, if you’ve been paying the least bit attention to the past 15 years (or if you’re like me, transgender and having lived through those years) the current proposed ruling against trans identities is not shocking nor groundbreaking. It’s just an officiate of what’s been happening all along. Having it passed as law would surely make things worse, that’s no doubt, but did you honestly think we we’ve been protected by the law this whole time? Did you really think that America took gender seriously as it pertains to trans people? That we were being protected in the workplace, or under medicine?
Fourth, this is why Asexual Awareness Week exists. This is how community works. It takes a lot of work to learn and grow into yourself, in the face of a cisheteronormal world. A planned event like Asexual Awareness Week is dedicated to spreading resources for everyone, a-spec or not. And you can bet your Tumblr-politix-edgy ass that being ace and trans makes for a tumultuous time as of right now.
So it’s not impressive to me, a trans ace (of color and disabled, as well), that exclusionist-Tumblr’s attention is focusing on pushing down Asexual Awareness Week, instead of actually focusing on the real issue. Because that’s what’s happening. Sex being defined as immutable and unworthy of lawful protection is the current trans reality in the USA. We saw this coming because it’s been happening. ‘Lose their humans rights’? What rights? Were we protected citizens of the USA before this?
Instead of talking about how to protect trans people, I see threads upon threads of how to abuse and manipulate aces (especially youth ace). It’s the bread and butter of exclusionism, really. Can’t have room for two, so instead kill the one. And that’s not how a community works.
You can’t take Asexual Awareness Week away from me. I’m a trans ace, and I demand to be seen during these dark days ahead.
Took them to church and then burned the down around them. Bravo
“rape, abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, assault, and violence against aces isn’t because they’re ace, but because of ____. also its easy being ace.”
whitemanning critical 