aroacelibrary:

“You can’t have sex with people you aren’t attracted to” holds the exact same concept as “sex is something that should only be shared with someone you love” that the old ladies at church use to slut shame the younger woman there.

In other words: it’s another argument that is continuing this trended downward slope in discourse towards a more conservative and puritanical view of most things; this time targeting sex as an act with the crux of “if you are not ingaging is sex in a way I find appropriate then you will be questioned, interrogated, and demonized for it.”

junkercourse:

lesbie-vague:

junkercourse:

the LEAST punk thing is inclusionism and that’s the tea. punk is about rebelling against the system not about pleasing everybody and letting them in spaces that aren’t meant for them.

Reminder it’s not punk to kick people out of communities they’re already a part of and take away needed resources because you and your tumblr buddies feel like it

this is so funny what resources to cishet aces need that they can ONLY get from lgbt groups.

the fact that asexuality even exists is usually the first thing we claim from lgbt+ community resources so

androgyne-enjolras:

cis people hold systematic privilege on the basis of being cis. ‘cisphobia’ is an empowering joke. 

straight people hold systematic privilege on the basis of being straight. ‘heterophobia’ is an empowering joke. 

a-spec people do not hold systematic privilege on the basis of being a-spec. ‘aphobia’ is not an empowering joke. At it’s most innocent, it’s bullying. At it’s worst, it’s bigoted abuse that endangers, scars and traumatizes LGBT+ people. 

blandalorian:

seebaru:

shoelace-and-friends:

the-eclectic-wonderer:

kurosmind:

Last saturday there was a whole radio program on one of Italy’s main radio stations about asexuality that ended up just being two women giggling about how “those weirdos are sick, and they want to be proud of it! lol! but at least they don’t reproduce so the disease won’t spread”. 

They said asexuals people are gross and need to be kept at distance. That we should become extinct as soon as possible. “keep the children far from this”.

Asexual people got mocked and insulted Nation-wide, and now there will be people that, not previously knowing what asexuality is, will think that we’re just dumb sick weirdos.

So yes, obviously there’s absolutely no stigma at all, no social backlash at all with being asexual, or god forbid aromantic. Yup.

I’m tired.

The good news is, people are reacting to this. I’ve seen this reported and criticised in several quite well-known newspapers, and the Italian lgbtq+ community is taking action against this kind of representation. A lot of people have attacked and/or questioned the two women, the author of the program and the program’s pages, and while I don’t think there’s going to be any kind of official apology (nor do I care: these people are horrible and an apology wouldn’t be sincere), it’s good to know that people are fighting with us and that we’re part of a bigger community, despite what some gatekeepers on here like to claim.

Be strong, ace friends!!

Here is an article on what happened for anyone who thinks we’re just making shit up (it’s in Italian though) 

I was bored, so here’s a rough translation of the article.

“Asexuals are weird, they’re sick”, debate on the Radio2 broadcast hosted by Paola Perego

On Radio2, during the radio broadcast “Al posto del cuore”, asexuals have been heavily mocked.

Just few days ago we told you about “asexuals”, trying to explain what asexuality is, and today we have to talk about it again, because of what happened on August 4th on Radio2, during the radio broadcast “Al posto del cuore”.

The hosts Paola Perego and Laura Campiglio have indeed confronted the theme of asexuality, mocking it far and wide (HERE’s the recording of the episode, from minute 10). The two hosts have introduced the topic as “something we have to firmly say no to: asexuals”, then went on with an embarrassing, to say the least, verbal crossfire.

“Are they the ones who don’t get laid?”.
“No, worse, they reclaim this thing as a life choice. What’s next?”.
“But do they exist? Are there men as well? Men who have no interest in sex?” “Crazy but true”.
“According to recent studies, they’re 1% of the population: it’s a very widespread disease”.
“They’re sick, this is crazy”.
“These weirdos, because they are weird…”.
“They reclaim their life choice just like that, with no shame, I can’t fathom”.
“Aren’t they living a better life? They have no distractions and women can not shave…”.
“Paola, please, stop, you’re talking like an asexual”.
“This condition of theirs, this illness of theirs, let’s admit it…”
“There’s good news: asexuals for sure don’t reproduce, so they’re an endangered category”.

These words have of course made the asexual associations of Italy flare up, who have been doing informative work, local and national activism for years, with their little means and with the effort and passion of many volunteers, to reduce the many commonplaces about them. Asexual people (for whom the data of 1% is to be considered outdated, there are numbers about 5% when it comes to the asexual “spectrum”) are victims of prejudices.

“A radio broadcast like this one, deeply offensive and disinformative, on air at 11 am of what is practically a holiday”, Gruppo Asessualità –

Arcigay Milano, NovarArcobaleno, Arcigay Rainbow Vercelli Valsesia, Collettivo Asessuale Carro di Buoi and AVEN Italia stress through a public statement, “definitely didn’t bring anything good, especially toward those younger people who, as soon as they have “come out” to their families, will feel mocked like this, and thus invalidated and put to shame in front of their loved ones, and to those who are not “out” yet, but felt offended and treated as circus freaks on a national scale”.

Asexuality, we have to stress, is defined as a sexual orientation characterized by the lack of sexual attraction toward all genders. They started talking about asexuality during the studies of Alfred Kinsey, at the end of the 40s, who noticed a percentage of people (evaluated between 1% and 10%) who didn’t have sexual attraction toward any gender. The first asexual association, only virtual at the time (AVEN – Asexual Visibility and Education Network), was founded almost 20 years ago (in 2001). Asexual groups participate in the Pride on global scale since 2008. In Italy, the first asexual groups have participated to a Pride for the first time in 2014, at the Milano Pride. In 2018, the asexual groups have participated, in an organized way, in five Pride of the Onda Pride, and in at least three of these some activists of the asexual community were present as organizers.

“Visibility is one of the reasons of the existence of asexual associations and groups itself”, they go on. “We can, gladly, do without the visibility given by Radio2 in this way. We won’t ask for an apology from the hosts. We only ask, if media don’t have interest in talking about asexuality with awareness of the facts, to please not talk about it. They are free to talk about the summer adventures of some guy from a reality show. After all, it’s better to be useless than harmful”.

There is another article, actually! It was written yesterday, and it includes the answer from Marco Salvati, who is the author of the radio program. You can read it (in Italian) here.

I’m a little tired now and I don’t have the energy to translate the second article right now, but the summary is this: the two female hosts didn’t say anything about the matter anymore, and Salvati pretty much dismissed the whole thing and all the people who were hurt by this, saying something like “it was a joke, it’s crazy, now you can’t even tell a joke about supplì [supplì is an Italian food, T/N] because there’ll be an association for the defense of supplì that will sue you”, and… he’s probably an exclusionist as well, because he said that “trans and homosexual people are mocked and deprived of fundamental rights, but asexuals are not mocked because they have the same rights as single people, you can’t recognize them on the street so it’s impossible to make fun of them”.

I’m not even surprised. I’m just disheartened.

i hope all of those “we don’t hate ace people” exclusionists can find time between their acey incel jokes to remember how to pretend to look outraged.

im white so i dont wanna overstep but yall gotta stop headcanoning or speculating people of color as asexual because it either hypersexualizes them by making normal people of color look like they are some sex starved beasts which is wrong or it desexualizes them and pushed the whole”purity”crap . It especially applies to desi women characters/ppl whose fear of sex coz of the way the concept of sex is taught to them is mistaken for asexuality. in short asexuality is a white supremacists dream lol

chelanisbench:

thefemaleofspecies:

This anon is such a mess.Also are you bottomsona??you like that prick lol anyways :

1. I am a brown south asian desi asexual woman.Is your white ass really gonna educate ME about this??Someones got a superiority as well as white savior complex lol

2.All that bullshit you typed about not HCing people of color as asexual is BULLSHIT.Being asexual states NOTHING about your sex life or how much sex your are having/not having except the fact that you dont experience sexual attraction.THATS IT.There is no hyper or hypo sexualization involved.

3.Also did you just say “normal” people of color????wow you sure do think that asexuals are some sort of mentally ill or abnormal people huh?

4.Again that shit you wrote about desi women having fear of sex because of inaccurate sex education is FUCKING WRONG.This is some “all africans  are poor and are dying everyday” bullshit which is pushed by white feminists to make colonized countries look bad and feed into their white savior complex.Our sex education is much more practical  and accurate than yours because we dont have governments pushing celibacy based sex education and discouraging kids from using condoms and using those shitty lollipop metaphors to tell girls that they dont have any value after they lose their virginity.We study about human reproduction as well as STD and various types of contraceptives as a part of our biology lessons in 10th and 12th grades which comes in our exams too.The “fear” your describing is just like any other teen girl feels when they are told that sex with men is gonna be violent and is supposed to hurt which is coz of misogyny lol.I have friends who are very much sex positive so idk why u said that shit in the first place.

5.” Asexuality is a white supremacists dream” is complete bullshit and i would have wrote another paragraph about this if i had the time which i dont.

In short, take your white ass away and stop acting like you care about POC and are not just using that annoying ass arguments to further your own bigoted views.You said that you didnt wanted to overstep??Well you FUCKING DID.Fuck off

This anon is confusing my black self

im planting my big fat asian fist into anon’s yt stomach

arotaro:

Hot fucking take, but you know what? Designating aromanticism and asexuality as a “white people thing” is, in fact, racist.

To give in a example: I am hispanic. We’re stereotyped as being overly romantic and sexy, good “lovers”, seductive, always get married and have big families, etc. By saying that aromanticism and asexuality are only for White People™, you’re denying me agency over my own sexuality and romanticism. You’re saying that because I’m hispanic, that I have to be romantic, and I have to be sexual.

Labeling aromanticism and asexuality as a “white people thing” erases aspecs of other races and ethnicities- many of whom need extra support due to perceptions of romance and sexuality within their own cultures- and forcibly subjects them to harmful stereotypes. That’s racism.

bai-xue:

allomeo:

at all you freak as aceys who wanna be called queer like your life depends on it fine! catch me calling every single one of you freaks and weirdos because thats what it goddamn means.

OP wants so bad to be acceptable to the cishets that he straight up admits how much he hates the “freakish” members of the community

It must be so painful being a closeted ace on tumblr nowadays. We fought hard to make asexual resources more widespread, because young aces deserve answers. The alternative is daunting. And I lived it.

When I was a teenager, I destroyed my body by forcing myself into sexual situations because I didn’t know about asexuality. Well, I knew about it, but of course I wasn’t asexual. No one in their right mind would be.

I was young, Asian, depressed, and a closet ace. All my access to basic human decency relied on sex. I didn’t know how to address sexual intimacy, or romantic relationships. I didn’t have any asexual vocabulary or knowledge of what it meant to be ace.

I’ll never be able to regain a whole chunk of my life. That’s all been tainted by years of neglect and abuse.

So I’m part of a movement that’s trying to prevent such a thing from happening again. And this bullshit pushback that I’m seeing? This claim that our attempts to save ace youth is somehow a detriment to people who aren’t ace? That our readiness to offer options is to blame for the actions of our mutual oppressors?

My closeted, confused young self was on the road to death. That’s inarguable. That’s what happens when aces have no options.

Even now, I struggle with asexual explicitry and how to embrace sex as a queer survivor. I NEED asexual visibility. And I need others like me to find a community with.

This shitty trend of trying to erase asexual growth is flat out violence.